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Displaying 10 most recent entries.
3/16/10 - Lauren on Fox News 25: Drivers of Infidelity – 3/16/10
(FOX 25 / MyFoxBoston.com) – Scum, sleaze, cheater — we all have certain names we use to describe those who are unfaithful in their marriage.
And there’s been a lot of this going on, from Tiger Woods to John Edwards, to former New York Governor Elliot Spitzer, just to name a few.
Yet, while one partner is labeled a villain, the other is a victim. However, Lauren Mackler tells us it may not that simple.
Lauren Mackler, psychotherapist, coach and author of the international best seller “Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life,” recently joined the FOX25 Morning News to talk about the hidden drivers behind infidelity.
2/24/10 - Women’s attraction may lie in immune system DNA
Read this article, Women’s attraction may lie in immune sytem DNA on m24Salud.
Researchers from the University of Western Australia made a DNA study with 150 college students and they found that ‘the secrets of attraction are hidden in immune system genes that we inherit from our parents’.
Scientists can not ensure ‘why the strength of the immune system influences the women success in relationships’.
Furthermore they said that neither can fully explain “the relationship between the sweat, and the irresistible genes, but there is a clear possibility that there are clues in the genetic constitution of the women immune system’.
The more varied a woman’s histocompatibility, or MHC, genes are, the more attractive she appears to the opposite sex.
Another theory is that women with varied MHC genes could be more outgoing.
“It is possible that MHC-diverse women have more sexual partners because they actively seek more partners, rather than because males prefer diverse partners,” wrote the researchers.
Relationship expert Lauren Mackler says parents may affect how successful a woman is at finding a boyfriend – but not necessarily because of genetics.
“We are invariably attracted to people based on how familiar that person is to us from childhood,” says Mackler, author of “SoleMate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life.”
“As human beings, we are always seeking homeostasis, or balance, and looking for the parts of us that got lost as we grew up and had to adapt to the family system. So we’re attracted unconsciously to the people who embody these traits. We are looking for our other half and may not always find him.”
2/24/10 - Becoming the Partner You Seek: Interview with Lauren on HealYourLife.com
Lauren Mackler, bestselling author of Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life, renowned coach, and relationship expert, talks about mastering the art of aloneness and becoming the partner you seek. Lauren has risen to international prominence as the creator of Illumineering, a groundbreaking coaching method that integrates family systems work, psychodynamic psychology, and coaching to help people free themselves from the shackles of their life conditioning, and create the personal and professional lives to which they aspire.
2/23/10 - Treatment for sex addiction no guarantee of saving Tiger Woods & Elin Nordegren’s marriage on New York Daily News
Read this article by Rosemary Black on New York Daily News.
Overcoming sex addiction is frequently a long, painful struggle that can detour into relapse and not infrequently end with the implosion of a marriage, experts say.
In Tiger Woods’ case, the fact that he has signed in to intensive inpatient therapy means he’s committed to getting better, but the healing process won’t be anywhere close to finished by the time he leaves the Mississippi facility where he’s reportedly staying.
Inpatient sex addiction rehab, says Leslie Seppinni, Ph. D., is often an intense several weeks or months during which the person tries to learn alternative strategies for dealing with stress through therapy and journaling.
“It can be incredibly helpful and life-changing,” Seppinni says. “When you are dealing with the fallout from your behavior, intensive inpatient therapy can help you get the coaching strategies you need so you can go back into the world, having gotten to the core of some of your emotional problems.”
Outpatient treatment is still needed, she says, and relapse is common.
“There is a high percentage of people who relapse,” Seppinni says. “Every once in a while, the addiction rears its ugly head again. People expect some relapse.”
Some experts question whether sex addiction is even a real disorder, and it may not be listed in the fifth edition of the American Psychiatric Association’s widely-used Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.
Sex addiction is real, but Tiger Woods doesn’t have it, according to Danine Manette, author of “Ultimate Betrayal: Recognizing, Uncovering and Dealing with Infidelity.”
“Tiger Woods is no different from Alex Rodriguez, Tom Brady or any other professional rich man who surrounds himself with unlimited women,” she says. “It’s horrible because he’s married and is now violating the commitment that he made to his wife. But it’s not sex addiction.”
True sex addicts experience personality changes, are unable to function in the outside world and may substitute pornography for contact with real people, she says. Intensive inpatient therapy may be appropriate for them, Manette says.
“But people like Tiger Woods go into treatment because they believe that if they show they are working on something, people will be willing to reinvest in them,” she says. “The reality is that Tiger has no self control.”
Still, proponents of sex addiction therapy say it can work – if it targets the person’s underlying issues and doesn’t focus on the addiction as a sickness that was present all along.
An addict always seeks relief from emotional pain, explains relationship expert Lauren Mackler, and if the treatment plan doesn’t include ways for the client to cope with that pain, it will be ineffective.
One of Mackler’s clients had been a sex addict for 11 years, she said, and had bought into the idea that “he was what he was,” she says. He felt that the best way he could manage his addiction was to have online sex rather than an actual sexual relationship, and had tried one therapy group after another.
He had not ever tried dealing with his emotional burden, which included a critical and demanding father, Mackler said. When he was able to work through childhood issues, that helped with his sexual issues.
Treatment for sex addiction, Mackler says, is usually sought by a person only when he is caught.
2/22/10 - Solemate Interview with Lauren Mackler
Lauren Mackler, bestselling author, life coach, and relationship expert, talks about her personal journey that inspired her bestselling book, Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life and workshop. Drawing from her own experiences; those of her coaching clients; and the fields of psychology, physiology, sociology, holistic healing, and strategic business practices, Lauren has developed a unique program for reclaiming your innate wholeness. This gradual, stepbystep process involves understanding where your selfdefeating patterns come from and how to move beyond them. She helps you uncover and retrieve your authentic self—who you really are beneath the layers of life conditioning. Laurens groundbreaking program will help you live in a more conscious and deliberate way, move beyond your self-defeating patterns, and become the person you were born to be.
2/18/10 - The Critical Factors for Success: Interview with Lauren Mackler
Lauren Mackler, bestselling author, renowned coach, and relationship expert, talks about the most critical factors in achieving success. Lauren Mackler is one of the foremost visionaries in the personal and professional development field today. She has risen to international prominence as the creator of Illumineering, a groundbreaking coaching method that integrates family systems work, psychodynamic psychology, and coaching to help people free themselves from the shackles of their life conditioning, and create the personal and professional lives to which they aspire.
2/10/10 - Valentine’s Day, Not Just for Romance Anymore: Girls Night Ideas for February 14
Read this article on Examiner.com by Jordan Salvatoriello
Ahh, Valentine’s Day. It can be the bee’s knees for star-crossed sweethearts, a qualmy conundrum for the newly twitterpated, or a day of dread for the singleton Scrooge. But, be careful Miss Lonely Heart, stare long enough into that abyss and the abyss stares back at you (xoxo, Nietzsche). So trash your “anti” Valentine’s Day notions, and let Hallmark know who’s boss by seizing the holiday and making it your own. After all, there is plenty of love in your life, no? Buy your own damn box of chocolates, gather your team around you, and celebrate the annual day of love with those that have given so much of it to you. Here are some ideas and local events to consider, so start planning now!
- Host a “self-celebration” Valentine’s Day potluck: Forgo the pity party, and celebrate yourself instead. Potlucks are easy to organize and a great way to unify a group of friends over a communal experience. “Ask each guest to bring their own favorite food dish and a wrapped gift to give to themselves,” said Lauren Mackler, author of Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life. Go on. Be good… Click here to read the entire article.
2/10/10 - Alone on February 14?
Valentine’s Day is, for many singles, a holiday to dread instead of one to celebrate. I experienced my own loneliness on more than one Valentine’s Day. Then, several years ago, I had a revelation. I could be my own Valentine!
I know, being your own Valentine might sound like a desperate attempt to soothe the sting of single life. I thought so, too—until I actually experienced it. The first year of becoming my own Valentine, I organized a dinner at a nice restaurant for a group of single men and women. On the invitation I wrote a request: “buy, have gift-wrapped, and bring to dinner a gift for yourself in recognition of the magnificent person you are.”
It was one of my favorite Valentine’s Day celebrations! We took turns opening our gifts and sharing what we admired about ourselves. Some people were moved to tears, as they realized … Click here to read the entire article on HealYourLife.com.
2/5/10 - Lauren’s Interview on QualityHealth.com
Read this article on QualityHealth.com.
Trouble Pleasing Your Partner?
By Rosemary Black
It’s an all-too-common scenario: A spouse feels overworked, underappreciated and overwhelmed with a job, household and kids to care for. Resentment and exhaustion take their toll, and she feels less and less like having sex. With a busy life, there just isn’t time for everything, let alone having an all night lovefest.
The problem can snowball into a relationship-wrecking issue. “The wife feels bad about herself,” says Lauren Mackler, psychotherapist and the author of Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life. “The man feels that he is not appreciated for what he is doing, and he just gets flack if he comes home too late or works too many hours. He feels… Click here to read entire article.



